In many areas of my life, I like things to be just so. I like things to be picked up and I don’t like clutter. My bed has to be made before I leave the house (every time) and I vacuum at least once a day, usually twice. One might think that when it comes to parenting, I’d be incredibly organized and follow a routine and rarely stray.
We always have something going on. My calendar is full. Literally, there is something written on every single day from now until the end of August. I mean, maybe save for a few empty spots (so I guess not literally). But for the most part, we are always on the go. We are always working on the next thing, getting ready for the next party/trip/event, and always moving. Lately I’ve been getting a lot of, “I just don’t know how you do it.”
“Oh I know, we are pretty busy!” is my short answer.
Here’s my long answer:
If we didn’t do it, we’d miss out.
If I didn’t plan dinners with friends or trips with family or playdates or play groups, I think we might get tired of each other and be lonely for friends! We love our friend time.
We like doing things on a whim. Deciding to do something and then just doing it without too much thought. Sometimes, it’s thinking of things that keeps you from doing it.
We most definitely have our fair share of quiet times at home. Lots of them. But sometimes kids need to get out. PARENTS need to get out. And some of our favorite memories are from when we’ve been out, doing something out of the ordinary with friends and with each other.
We try really hard to have adventures; to live in the moment and if we feel like doing something we will pack up and do it, even if that means putting the work and time and effort into it. Sometimes it means dealing with tears and melt downs and learning how to take deep breaths and just accept those as part of life and not letting the possibilities of difficult moments get in the way of the certainty of really amazing memories.
My father-in-law says, “Life isn’t a rehearsal.”
It’s stuck with me. When I wonder about doing something or whether or not an experience is worth it (time, money, etc) I think of that. One shot. This is what we get. If we don’t do it now, when will we?
Am I tired? Dude, I’m freaking exhausted. But it’s the kind of exhausted that makes me feel really good. Do people always agree with how Danny and I do things and think it’s the perfect way? No, but I have a secret: I don’t really care. If you aren’t hurting anyone, do your thing. I’ll do mine.
Our kids are happy.
Our kids are healthy.
Our kids are taken care of and being taught to be kind and generous (don’t worry, still a work in progress!)
And everything else is icing on the cake. We happen to like the flavor of spontaneity.